Is ego our enemy? Do we need to shut down our ego to live our best life?
Maybe our ego is like food
We need food to sustain our physical bodies. Food (taste) is one of the perks of being in this physical life. And eating together provides companionship. Yet many of us have a problematic relationship with food. We overeat, undereat, or eat food that isn’t healthy. So, does that mean food is bad? No. It’s more about how we use food in our life.
Ego serves a purpose, too
Ego, like food, assists babies manage their body. Centered in the mind, ego thinks, judges, and remembers past experiences. Because of that, it helps babies learn to survive in this world. For instance, it teaches babies that crying communicates they need help.
And ego spurs them on to figure out how to feed themselves, grab stuff, walk and run. Sometimes it reminds them about what their parents said: “Don’t run out in the street in front of that car, you’re going to get really hurt!..”
The ego gives answers; creates strategies and plans. It reminds us what got us in trouble the last time we did that. And the ego judges everyone, including ourselves. That’s the ego thinking it’s protecting us from getting hurt emotionally or physically.
Don’t make ego the “Big Kahuna”
Our soul, which for me resides in the heart center, is meant to guide our life. That is where our “Best Self” lives.
We get into trouble when we forget that the ego (the planner, evaluator, protector and judger) is there to assist our soul to achieve its hopes and dreams. Not to rule our life. But the head speaks to us 24/7 and creates strong emotions to pull us off course. Pretty soon, happiness slips away.
In a perfect world, the heart/soul whispers its desires and the head/ego looks for ways to make it happen. And make the soul happy. For most of us, it’s not that easy. We need to clear out a lot of “head trash,” as my friend Judy Kane says, before we can move forward with our heart/soul desires.
Put your soul (heart) back in charge!
- Decide your heart/soul’s ideal for this life. Think about it daily. (Edgar Cayce shared this.)
- Cultivate gratitude, love, joy and forgiveness as often as you can.
- Declare that your head’s (ego’s) job is to serve your heart. The heart points the way and the head helps it get there. And the head helps the heart avoid the pitfalls.
- Picture moving your ego (I picture it as a little jewel) from your head/mind into your heart, where the soul resides. Surround the ego with the soul/heart love and support. The head/ego knows it’s not supposed to be in charge. So when you allow it to relax in the heart/soul area, it experiences incredible relief.
- Do physical things that bring you joy and really focus on amplifying the joy – singing, dancing, playing a musical instrument, running, playing with your kids or your pets
- Use the “head serves the heart” mindset with your beloved animals. Make decisions from the heart. Find ways to help them express their “Best Selves.”
When did you lead from your heart? How did your head support your heart? I’d love to hear about it.