Many of us wonder, “When should we adopt after losing our pet?” The grief of losing our beloved animals is overwhelming for quite a while. It’s always more distressing than we thought it would be. That’s true even if it’s not the first time we’ve lost an animal. As a result, well-meaning people who see our distress may push us to find another pet to quiet our grief.
Are we disloyal?
On the other hand, we may hesitate to adopt after losing our pet. This would be so disloyal! How could we “forget” this wonderful being and begin a new relationship full of love and life with another pet?
I’m being a bit dramatic. But I’ve lived through this. So have you, I’m guessing. Over time, we forget the depth of that pain of loss. Thank goodness.
But still, what’s the right thing to do about adopting a new pet? How do we honor our pet’s memory if we want to move forward? How do we decide when it’s OK to find someone else?
Don’t move forward too fast
A friend loved his dog Penelope so much, he quickly found another dog who looked like just like Penelope. He just couldn’t bear to be without Penelope. But he hadn’t finished grieving for Penelope – she was his first dog as an adult. This new dog, Jenna, has a very different personality and some tough issues. On top of dealing with the tough issues, he’s still upset that she’s not Penelope. He’s working through it, but it’s been hard to watch.
Experience the sacred vibration of grief
Don’t skip the mourning process by getting another animal too soon. Instead, honor your grief. Give yourself time to watch it move through you and subside. Make sure you’re ready for a completely new soul to join your life.
Listen to your inner guidance
Listen to that part of you that knows what’s best for you. For example, it could be your higher self, your intuition, or your connection with Creator. It’s generally not your guilt or regret about the relationship. Your inner guidance will tell you if you need more time to grieve or you’re ready to find another soul to join your family. There’s no right answer.
Ask your departed animal to help you
Sounds crazy until you try it. I’ve met people who are sure their departed animal has steered them towards their next animal. They probably can’t tell you how they know it’s true. It just is. And it’s very comforting to know they are helping you – they’re ok with your moving on!
Look into their eyes; find the connection
Your next animal is looking for you, too. They want to be part of your family. Feel for the soul connection. It’s not rational, it’s intuitive. You’ll know it when you meet them. If it makes sense, include the rest of the family in the decision making. Trust the process.
My friend and client Linda was ready to adopt a new kitten. She was sure she found “the one.” When she went to meet her, that kitten wouldn’t give her the time of day!!
But another kitten came around, purring and loving on her. He wouldn’t leave her alone. He explained, (I’m making this up)
“Hey, Linda, the other kitty and I worked out a bait and switch! She got you here, but you’re MINE!! That’s why she’s ignoring you and I’m your new best friend. You’re supposed to take ME home. I’m a real lover!”
It was a successful “courtship” – Don Juan is now Linda and her husband’s kitty.
How did you know it was the right time and the right animal? I’d love to hear your story!
Did you know I have a Facebook group called Spiritual Pet People? We share positive stories about our animals and other animals. I’d love to have you join us!